Time Out for Women Comes Full Circle

Early in November I attended the Phoenix "Time Out for Women" hosted by Deseret Book. I was also there on assignment and wrote an article about it for the Deseret News, which AP (Associated Press) picked up and from there KTAR (a local Phoenix station) picked it up and posted it on their website because it was a local event. Pretty cool!!!

Here are the links to my article: Time Out for Women comes full circle ending its 2012 tour in Phoenix where it began 10 years-ago ~ Deseret News, posted Tuesday, Nov. 6th and also in their print edition of the paper on Thursday, Nov 8th, 2012, Section C, Page 5 

And here is KTAR's website link to my article ~ I had a blast!! Fun assignment. Here are some of the pics - there are 11 photos on the Deseret News site, mostly of presenters (and I'm in a few).

    Friday evening Heidi Swinton spoke on "Seeking the Savior." 
     She is an author and screenwriter whose works include the PBS
  documentaries "American Prophet," "Sacred Stone," 
"Sweetwater Rescue,"Trail of Hope" and "America’s Choir." 
          She wrote President Thomas S. Monson's biography, "To the Rescue."

Chris Williams spoke on the power of
forgiveness. He is the author of  "Let it Go." 

While I was there I reconnected with friends I had not seen in awhile. In this case, Linda de Azevedo is someone I had not seen since I left my home ward, Studio City Ward, Burbank Stake (now the North Hollywood California Stake), to go to BYU. She is from Salt Lake City and came to watch her daughter, Julie de Azevedo Hanks, give one of the presentations.

         It's always fun to run into people you 
         know at Time Out for Women - 
         here are two ward member friends, 
         Kelly Merrill and Heather Roche

They brought all of the presenters out on stage the first evening to give a little "blurb" about what they would be speaking and/or singing about. 
        
               (Didn't get a very good pic of it).

Anthony Sweat. Sweat is an author and Church Educational System presenter/educator.

It was a lot of fun and even this ol' brain that's been around for quite awhile got some great ideas to help improve my life. Next year - let's all go... who has a BUS????

When Life Gets Too Hard to Stand, Just Keep on Rolling

Had a book review posted online at Deseret News. Pretty amazing lady:

Meg Johnson, a Utah transplant from Idaho, is an active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, a sought-after motivational speaker, author and artist. She is also a quadriplegic. Johnson shares her sunny outlook on getting through life’s rough spots in a new book, “When Life Gets Hard …”

You can read the entire book review at this web address: Book Review for "When Life Gets Hard"

Enjoy!!

Dishwater Redemption

I'm a little hesitant to share this poem. I happen to really like it and if you don't, I probably don't want you to tell me. :)

I first wrote this many years ago when our children were still young.Then, a few years ago, I worked on is some more and hence, the 2007 copyright date.

It is a true experience and has been a life-long reminder to me, although I have a long ways to go! It's also quite remarkable that it even happened as I married an awesome man who DOES DISHES and he does so much more often than I. However, on this particular night, I was up late doing the dishes.

I do ask that you not copy or use this poem, especially without my express permission. And I hope you like it...

Dishwater Redemption

The house is quiet.
My husband and children are asleep.
The silence of the room is interrupted
Only by the sounds I make while washing the dishes.

As I pick up each dish and rinse away our dinner,
I am reminded of the meal we enjoyed together.
The chatter of the children as they spoke of their day
Lingers in my mind and I feel a sweet contentment.

I’m nearly done when I notice my well-used cookie sheet,
Standing at the back of the dish drainer;
Even though I have washed it thoroughly,
It really doesn’t look very clean.

The evidence of so many batches of cookies baked
Over and over again until it looks tarnished and brown.
When it was new, it sparkled and shined.
Now it is discolored and scratched.

And for some reason, tonight, this bothers me.
I take the cookie sheet from its resting place and
Plunge it back into the warm, soapy water.
But I am unable to rid it of the baked-on grime.

I reach in the cupboard for an S.O.S. scouring pad
And go after the suspect brown specks with renewed vigor.
I pay special attention to the inside corners of the cookie sheet.
This proves to be especially satisfying and I continue until it shines.

It has been reborn and I can see my reflection in it.
And suddenly, I realize… I am like the cookie sheet.
I’m not dirty by any means, but perhaps,
Not quite clean enough either; I have lost some of my sparkle.

Leaning against the sink I know what I must do.
I will take upon me the S.O.S. scouring pad of repentance
And work and pray hard to be shiny and clean,
Until the Savior’s image shows in my countenance.

I plan to keep my cookie sheet as bright as it looks today
And with a few repairs here and there, and a heart full of love,
I can do the same for myself, that I might be more useful
To those I share this earthly space with.

Who knew? Sometimes, there’s not much difference between
A neglected ol’ cookie sheet and a life too busy to notice
Some of the sparkle and shine has faded.
Yes, S.O.S. pads are a beautiful thing.
                                             ~ © Stephanie Abney 2007

Live in Daily Thanksgiving

Thessalonians 5: 18 “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” (Holy Bible, KJV)

Alma 34:38 “… and take upon you the name of Christ; that you humble yourselves even to the dust, and worship God, in whatsoever place ye may be in, in spirit and in truth; and that ye live in thanksgiving daily, for the many mercies and blessings which he doth bestow upon you.” (Book of Mormon)

 

From two scriptural sources we can read that the Lord is counting on us to give thanks daily, for every single thing, good or bad. Hmmm. How are you doing with that one? Been complaining lately? Life is often hard, there’s no escaping that fact. It’s usually inconvenient; but when all is said and done, it’s still amazingly wonderful.

I’ve lived a long time (and I hope I’ll be of sound mind and health to live a lot longer – I’m pretty fond of waking up every day). Two very important things I have learned along the way is that first, we’re not in charge. And second, we need to GET OUT OF THE WAY!!! The Lord sees things from the beginning to the end. He knows what will bring us growth, joy, benefit … even if we don’t see it at the time. He can do a lot more with our lives than we can if we were left in charge. We just need to be grateful for the lessons that come and the results they bring. If it’s still hard, then He isn’t done yet and we need to be patient and long-suffering.

It’s easy to be grateful for the good things; the beauty of the earth, wonderful people and opportunities in our lives, food on the table, a roof over our heads and gas in the car, just to name a few blessings. But it’s dang hard to be grateful for health challenges, terminal illnesses, difficult people, lack of anything, accidents, lost homes or jobs; in fact, loss of any kind. It’s difficult to be grateful when our feelings have been hurt or worse. In either instance, there are lessons to be learned. We learn from both abundance and lack, from success and failure and learning to take things as they come, with a grateful heart makes the tough stuff a little easier to deal with.

I need to work on this. I suspect most people do. I only bring it up because these are the verses and thoughts that came to my mind when I wondered what I should write about for Day 2 of blogging every day in November. I didn’t choose a “gratitude” blog for the month – although it’s a great idea – I just was hoping to post something of worth (for myself and hopefully for anyone reading this) every day. So, there you have it. A grateful heart … NO matter what. What do you think?

Today we have been married FORTY-ONE years!!!

41 years ago, Jim and I were sealed in marriage for "Time and All Eternity" in the Los Angeles Temple. We're still kickin' and loving life. It's been good, bad, wonderful, hard, funny, sad ... you name it, but it has all been worth it and that's what matters. 

Here is a cinquain poem I wrote years ago - still applies: 

Comfort
Feeling secure
Where judgment has no place
Wrapped in the safety of your arms
Husband

Stephanie Abney ~   © 1998

I couldn't hope to "re-cap" 41 years so I posted what has emerged as our "theme song" ~ "Through the Years" by Kenny Rogers. Enjoy - I'll be busy ...

Day 22 ~ Earth Day or Good Friday Poem

~ FREE VERSE POETRY ~ for the entire weekend (Friday [also Earth Day & Good Friday], Saturday, Easter Sunday)

OK - looks like we'll be having several free-verse poems coming up that only have a prompt to them, due to Easter Weekend.

Well, you can pretty much write it any way you want.

If you are checking here to find poetry, you may not see too many. I continue to get most of my responses (newly created poetry) via email through my ANWA Writers Group and an online friend group called LDS Forever Friends. Only a couple of people seem to be using this blog to respond on. Which is fine. Fewer people see your work, but the whole idea was to celebrate National Poetry Month. Even if all that has happened for you is to have been thinking about it or just enjoying reading what others are writing, that's great. Mission accomplished. If you are writing your own poems, I hope you have created a document file to keep them in. It will mean a lot to you and your family even if you never publish or submit them anywhere.

OK, rules (or NOT) for Free Verse:
A poem that is written without a pattern or rhyme. The possibilities are limitless. Give it a shot.

So, today is "Earth Day" - there are lots of mixed and even strong emotions on this one, but how about writing a poem (any style so far or just use free verse) about what the earth means to you. 

Or, since today is also "Good Friday" you could use that for your prompt. Or anything about Easter, particularly of a spiritual nature.

Both topics could easily lend themselves to the idea of renewal, spring, growth, etc. See what you come up with. 

Enjoy!!

Book Review - The Waterfall Concept: A Blueprint for Addiction Recovery

The Waterfall Concept: A Blueprint for Addiction Recovery
by Roger Stark, Silver Star Publishing, 192 pages, $19.95 

This is a fabulous book!! No matter what habits or addictions steal your time and/or your happiness, you can find the tools in this book to be extremely useful. I'll post my more detailed review for my regular Book Review blog once I get permission from MormonTimes.com ~ in the meantime, you can follow the link and read it there. Then I would love it if you came back here and left a comment and then followed the last link to Deseret News where you can leave comments and leave one there as well. Thanks so much!!

Roger Stark's own journey of recovery gave him the desire to become an addiction counselor. Now he shows others the way to healing through one-on-one counseling, at recovery retreats and in his new book, "The Waterfall Concept: A Blueprint for Addiction Recovery." Read the Complete Book Review at Deseret News

The Gift of Time

Today is my only sister’s birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CAMILLE!! It is also my grandson’s birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ELIAS!! They are decades apart but it has made me think about how birthdays come and birthdays go. What have we done with all the days in between our own birthdays?

Sunday is the birthday of one of my dear friends (Margaret) but they are going out of town this weekend. So today, one of Margaret’s daughters has set up a schedule of birthday visits unbeknownst to her. Brittany privately emailed all of her mom’s friends who live in the area and asked them to sign up for 30 minute blocks throughout the entire day to stop by and visit Margaret to celebrate her birthday. I’m curious to find out how Brittany made plans to keep her mom home as Margaret works outside of the home. (I’m guessing she made some sort of prearrangement with her mom’s boss) and the friends start coming first thing in the morning so Margaret will be up and ready for the day but she’s never going to make it to work. :)



Margaret and I are both busy moms and grandmas. We seldom find time to just visit anymore. Usually, a quick exchange at church and an occasional phone call have to suffice. However, when one or the other of us is really needed, we are there. When BJ had leukemia, Margaret made sure to stop by as often as she could and when he passed away, she was there helping non-stop, giving comfort, cleaning, even taking cherished pictures the day of the funeral. When her 2-year-old grandson died unexpectedly, we went right over to her house to be with them and offer comfort. We have also been to temple weddings of each others’ children, been over to hear mission calls read and attended Eagle Courts of Honor. We are the kind of friends who know we love each other even when we never seem to be able to get together during a normal week or even month (or two or three).

Today, I am going to have 30 minutes of my friend’s undivided attention. We can catch up on each other’s lives, share memories, tell funny grandchildren stories, laugh, hug, cry… whatever. I have decided that what Brittany has given her mother is the gift of time. Could there possibly be a better gift? And one that can be shared with so many?

I recall reading a book by Linda Eyre when I was a young mom and one year her husband gave her “Wednesdays for a year” for her birthday. He was able to arrange his schedule to be home on Wednesdays and he took full charge of the children and the house all day Wednesday. She was free to write, soak in the tub, leave the house and go visiting, to the movies, to the library, to the temple, whatever her heart desired. It was a remarkable, restorative gift.

I’m thinking Heavenly Father has also given us the gift of time. When we left his presence in the pre-existence, we were given an allotted amount of time to fulfill our earthly mission. We don’t always know exactly what that mission is (as I am sure we have many “missions” and they grow and change as our life and our service does the same) and we certainly don’t know how much time He has given us, but it is a splendid gift. Sadly, I have too many regrets on how I have squandered my time on unimportant things, usually justifying it as needed “downtime.” And we do all need some downtime, but after having recently taken Stephen R. Covey’s course on “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” I’ve been reflecting on how I use my time more than usual. I see the need for some course corrections, to be sure. I also try not to be too hard on myself as that can be counterproductive. However, the simplest change here and there, over time, can achieve the grandest results. We are taught “line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little, and there a little, giving us consolation by holding forth that which is to come, confirming our hope!”

My hope for myself and all those reading this is that we can make even a few productive changes that will allow us to make better use of and thus have far better results with that most precious gift, the gift of time.

Eight Years and Still Growing

Growing Pains ~ interesting concept. Growth is inevitable, but not always easy. I looked in the scriptures and the people grew in strength and wisdom as well as in iniquity… kind of depended where their heart was.

I have a wonderful reminder of the constancy, hope and joy of growth on my kitchen table. Last Saturday was the eight anniversary of the passing of our sweet BJ from this life to the next. The tables at his funeral luncheon had little potted flowers on them and one of my dear friends, Kathy Thompson, took some home and planted them. Like me, Kathy doesn’t have much luck in growing plants, but these little flowers have continued to flourish. She calls them “BJ’s flowers.” They were planted in November and blossom each year in time for her to bring me a bouquet of them on November 8th. It’s a tradition I have cherished and appreciated.

Loving all kinds of flowers, but knowing only the names of a few, I had no idea the name of this flower. Last night we had our ANWA (writer's group) chapter meeting at my home and Ceil commented on the beautiful “Black-eyed Susans” I had on my table. Oh, wow, now I know… so this morning I looked them up on the Internet and sure enough, that is exactly what my little plant looks like.

Here’s the interesting part (and it’s pretty cool ~ just a reminder that Heavenly Father knows his children and does the most amazing things to show it) ~ these plants are supposed to bloom from June to August each year and yet BJ’s flowers bloom in November (of course, here in Arizona, November can still be rather warm). Then, the research nut that I am, I kept looking and you won’t believe what I found out about the ‘healing” properties of BJ’s flowers:

The Black-Eyed Susan helps to bring painful memories to light allowing inner healing to begin. In “flower essence therapy” this flower assists individuals in shedding deep burdens that are weighing them down emotionally.

Well, this is about all I can share right now as I have to leave for school soon ~ but I hope you can get the gist of all I wanted to share in how his plant continues to bloom each year and how a dear friend thought of doing that for us and what a sweet reminder it is of a very special young man who has changed our lives forever.

Have a blessed day!!